I made a mistake recently- I was feeling overwhelmed by life and often seemed to lose my patience with Lyla, so I started praying for patience and the ability to handle everything in my life. Sure enough, the last week has been all about teaching me that my life really isn't that hard and that I can do hard things!

Paul has been working very long days as well as Saturdays and we often go for days where Lyla only sees him for a few minutes. It's been really hard to handle everything at home alone especially since it's so cold that we're stuck inside all of the time. Then at the peak of my overwhelmed feelings Paul had to leave for two days for work. The first night he was gone I caught my toe on the couch and possibly broke it. I've been hobbling around ever since and most shoes still don't fit. That was very frustrating to me because it means not exercising everyday and not being able to run in Arizona next week which I’ve been so excited to do. Anyway, it was so disappointing on top of painful with each step I tried to take. Then on Friday Lyla got a nasty cold and shared it with Trevor and me. Colds always make Lyla extremely touchy and difficult, and then on Tuesday morning she started throwing up. I've decided that there isn't anything worse than holding your child as they gag and choke and throw up over and over. It went on every few minutes for 36 hours and was completely awful! She was often crying and begging me for food that I couldn't give her. Anyway, when I woke up this morning and she seemed to be feeling a bit better, it made me so grateful for my relatively easy life and that I don't have to deal with these things every day.

Lately I've really been trying to have a positive attitude about things- like being grateful that my kids sleep through most of the night instead of frustrated when they both wake up twice. I don't know why I've felt so weighed down by life and the little challenges that come up so often. People understand for the first month or so after a new baby, but I'm sure everyone is wondering when I'm going to toughen up and just learn to handle life since it’s going on three months since Trevor was born. I absolutely love being a mom but every day is a struggle and I've spent a lot of time trying to understand why it has to be so hard on a daily basis on top of the pregnancy, delivery, and other sacrifices we make to have a family. I have moments of perspective when I feel so grateful for this stage of life and feel determined to stop wishing this period of life away. But then during the day I get so overwhelmed and frustrated. I found this website (thank you pinterest) and have been very touched by some of the quotes.
http://ldsnana-askmormon.hubpages.com/hub/Motherhood---Inspirational-Quotes-By-LDS-Leaders-MormonWomen

I especially love this one from President Monson:

"My dear sisters, do not pray for tasks equal to your abilities, but pray for abilities equal to your tasks. Then the performance of your tasks will be no miracle, but you will be the miracle."


I know that this is exactly what I need to do in order to have the ability to handle my life. This morning I was also reading Elder Cook's conference talk and these parts really stood out to me:

"We are unaware of hosts of blessings that we receive from day to day. It is extremely important that we have a spirit of gratitude in our hearts... There are many kinds of chal­lenges. Some give us necessary expe­riences. Adverse results in this mortal life are not evidence of lack of faith or of an imperfection in our Father in Heaven’s overall plan. The refiner’s fire is real, and qualities of character and righteousness that are forged in the furnace of affliction perfect and purify us and prepare us to meet God."


I'm definitely feeling inspired and motivated to have a good attitude about my life. Now if only I can remember all of this in the months and years ahead...