As I fed this sweet little boy in the early morning hours, I was feeling exhausted and worn down from a challenging week with Lyla and week 4 of getting no more than 2-3 hours of sleep at a time. I started reading my friend's blog and discovered her recent experience of carrying a little boy to 41 weeks and then realizing he had stopped moving. Something had gone wrong and she had to go through all of the pains of labor only to hold her lifeless little boy. I cried as I imagined how this must feel, and I haven't been able to stop crying since then. Holding my sweet little Trevor and feeling so much love for him makes me wonder how it's possible for someone to get through such a challenging situation. My heart breaks for women who have had miscarriages or lost children later in life. I feel extremely grateful that at least at this point, I have not been given this trial in life- I'm not sure that I would be able to recover and move on from that. I know so many strong women who have experienced this trial and they are such great examples to me of faith and perseverance. I'm so grateful for the Atonement of our Savior which can help us get through these devastating experiences.


Two of my all time favorite quotes are:



"No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God...and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we came here to acquire and which will make us more like our Father & Mother in Heaven." ---Orson Whitney

"Adversity can increase faith or instead can cause the troubling roots of bitterness to spring up in one's life, and we cannot be both faith-filled and stressfree. Therefore, how can you and I really expect to glide naively through life, as if to say, "Lord, give me experience, but not grief, not sorrow, not pain, not opposition, not betrayal, and certainly not to be forsaken. Keep from me, Lord, all those experiences which made thee what thou art! Then let me come and dwell with thee and fully share thy joy." ---Neal A. Maxwell


I know that we are given trials for a reason. I'm trying each day to become more like my Father & Mother in heaven, and I know that this requires experiencing many hard things in life in order to gain the experience that they have. I'm so grateful that we have been given the tools to get through these hard times- especially the knowledge that we can always turn to our Savior for the comfort and understanding that we need because he truly understands all that we feel. Today I am feeling so grateful for the miracle of life, and for my precious little family. I know that the little trials that seem so hard to me are really insignificant because I really have been blessed with all I could ever want. I have moments when I feel tired of being a mom and want a little break, or when my sweet little toddler frustrates me so much that I want to scream, but today I've been reminded that I need to love every second that I get to spend with them. I'm so lucky to be their mom!!